Health and mood
16 September 2009 • Ricardo J. Bascuas • 4 Comments » • Tags: NoneA couple of the new people around the building are in the habit of answering, “How are you?” with, “I am well.” This has been driving me up the wall. It’s every bit as bad as, “between you and I,” which has the same effect on me as when Sister Joan used to scratch her fingernails all down the chalkboard to get the sixth grade to shut up.
So, I asked another colleague who I know to be sharp about such matters, “How are you?” and he said, “I’m okay. And you?” And I said, “Exactly. Because I’m not asking you about your health.”
“No, you’re inquiring after my state of mind or mood.”
Exactly. So, I asked him what was wrong with those folks who kept informing me how well they are. He said that they probably assume that the question is about their health “given their age,” by which he meant either that they’re presumptively frail or were brought up at a time when the question commonly meant something other than what we take most people to mean by it.
“Do you think that’s it or do they just not know the difference between an adverb and an adjective? Because I think it’s the latter.”
“I don’t know. It could be either, I guess.”
“All right, thanks. I’m good.”
“How are you?” is a polite question that is intentionally vague. It does not ask about state of mind, or health; it asks both and more. The question asks: “are you employed,” “did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed,” “how was traffic this morning,” “do you have a cold,” “how is your marriage,” and any number of other questions that may be socially appropriate at the time.
When someone answers “I am well,” they have just told you that they don’t have a cold. Both “I am well” and “I am ok” are acceptable answers when the question is viewed as described above.
What is annoying is when people give you socially inappropriate responses. It may be alright to tell your best friend about your messy divorce or your latest bout of “the clap” when he asks “how are you,” but it is not ok to give this information to casual acquaintances.
The question asked is different based on the relationship between the people exchanging greetings, and should be treated as such.
Just my $0.02.
I want to be a law professor when I grow up.
“How are you?” usually incites an equally general response, “I’m good.”
However, this is improper english; “I’m well” is the correct version of “I’m good.”
Perhaps you inquire of the grammatically correct, not those who wish to inform you that they are well-nourished/swine flu-free/still virile.
Actually the term “how are you” is a contraction of the phrase that had been used as a greeting prior to the renaissance. That phrase, a polite greeting mind you, was “How are your bowels?” Why? Because people in those days had a great interest in the humors, and how “bad” things were expelled from your body to keep you in good health. It was not an uncommon greeting and it was taken very seriously.
Hence my answer to the greeting “rotten.”